one month and no response

It's been about a month now with no response from the birth mom. We have sent 2 emails and asked questions, but haven't gotten any response back. It gets kind of frustrating when you feel like you are being ignored. I would feel a little better if she just said she needed some space to try and make up her mind and that she would email and let us know when she has decided. But instead nothing. I don't know if that means she is planning on keeping the baby and she doesn't have the guts to tell us, and is never going to respond to us again, or if this is her way of letting us know she isn't decided, but will get back with us when she is ready. She has been so open and honest this entire time, I would have never guessed she would just leave us hanging.

So we might be back to square one in the waiting process yet again. Bum deal, bum deal. :(

Haven't had a response for awhile

We were feeling really good after that last email we got but now we haven't heard anything for awhile. It's hard to not get discouraged and lose hope because ya just never know what is going to happen. And the fact that her due date is so far out (end November) there is a lot of time for her to change her mind or for her ex-husband to decide he wants to raise the baby rather than have someone else adopt it. We sent her an email on May 25th but haven't got any response back. I don't know if I should just wait until she responds or send her another short email. If I do send her an email I just don't even know what to say so I don't know what the point is of that. I wish I had something to motivate me to work hard or get my house and life in order but I just feel so unmotivated to do pretty much anything productive. I work a lot better if I have a deadline or goal to reach, but unfortunately I have nothing to work for right now. I am so past ready for a baby it's not even funny. It's the same lame crap every day: Sleep in, make me food which I hate doing, check my emails, check online to see if there are any promotional jobs (which is slow so there usually isn't anything)do the dishes, clean up the clutter and wish I were motivated to work on my home tending business. I work from home, so I don't get to interact with people all that often which is something I need. My life just seems so blah and it has been for way too long. I have no good friends where I live, which sucks. I know some cool people but they all have kids and sometimes I just want to spend time with other adults and have a conversation without a kid interrupting every 5 seconds in the middle of my thought or story.

This journey sucks and I am sick of having to be so patient all the time while 95% of people have this come so easily to them. Or if that is too much to ask, I wish I had a friend that I could relate to and spend time with so I could at least try and enjoy my life right now. But unfortunately I don't see that happening either, so I guess I will just have to be my own best friend and spend time by myself which I should be used to because a lot of my life I have had to do this.